I saw Prophecies Foretold: The Anti Christ" on the History Channel today. For 2 hours. It was boring. 2 hours. Was I out of my mind? I switched between that and The O.C and Monster Houses. Bleagh. Why is there nothing interesting on TV?

I went to Chilika yesterday with 5 other people. It was a lot of fun, especially since we just lazed around. I hate it when we go some place and people insist on doing something or 'the trip would have been a waste'. I especially hate it when people tell me that I could have 'lazed around at home. Why did you come on the trip?'. For the change in scenery, dumbass.

Anyway, it was fun. We left way too early in the morning and suffered through horrible roads. It was a very hot day. We took a boat and went to a kali temple on an island. B chased poultry. He stopped when some body said, "You are chasing a cock! Ha ha ha". I think this bird flu and lack of chicken has made some people slightly deranged. We then went to Gopalpur beach. It was beautiful but very very very hot. We were on the beach for 3 hours and then we went to an OTDC hotel.

SOmeone told us it was near the beach, so we walked. And walked and walked and walked. It is horrible to walk in the sun when you are tired and hungry and thirsty and sweaty. It was a long walk. We walked down a hot, stinky road; past tired dogs and broken down houses; past a very inviting, expensive looking hotel, down a narrow path with a great view of the bloody sun and into a very white hotel. It was very white. It was so white, it was difficult to look directly at it in the sunlight. Gleaming white. Like those clothes they show in detergent ads and teeth in toothpast ads. Sparkling white. Ujalavukku mariten.

We staggered in, ordered food, went to the room, washed and collapsed on the bed. We watched a few minutes of a hindi soap on TV and then the food came. Either food was awesome or we were starved. We ate well. And then played cards for 3 hours. D got chased by a couple of dogs. It was hilarious to watched him prance around with those two small dogs jumping up at him. We watched from the balcony and laughed at him. Mean, I know, but it was funny. Finally B had to go and rescue him. We then went back home. I slept all the way, as soon as the others stopped antakshari. I never really liked that game.

A good day.

A moment of silence for my alma mater.

Random

What do you do when you have nothing to do?

I have nothing to do. It's 41 degrees during the day. My skin burns when I am in the sunlight and my eyes feel like somebody is sitting inside and constantly scratching them. It hurts so bad. So, I am going to Chilika the day after tomorrow. We are leaving at 3 am! To escape the heat, I guess. I don't know what we'll see there. The birds have all gone away, to a cooler place. I wish I could just fly away.

I am sweating even now. It is so hot hot hot. Writing it three times makes no difference, I know, but it feels like I am stressing the word. Sort of like HOT! or hot or hot. Get it? Yeah, HOT.

The sun shines directly into my room in the morning. 7 am and it's like somebody turned on all the lights and the heat just shoves me out of bed. If my floor was a little cleaner and I was not bothered by little creepy crawlies and cobwebs, I'd sleep under my bed. And if I fit, of course.

I went to Coffee Day today, for the first time since the Incident. They asked me if I wanted a Cafe Mocha. Hmph. I'll never live it down. I have not had that much attention on me ever. It felt weird. Flattering, annoying and weird.

There is some kind of party in the hostel tonight. I am almost done with this place. I don't know how I feel. I think I'll miss a few people, the amazing access to movies and music, and all the free time I had. I don't know if I'll keep in touch with many people. Past experience suggests that I won't. I am in touch with around 10 people from my engineering days. And about 4 from school. It would be nice to keep in touch with more, let's see.

You know what's really sad? I don't know anybody in the batch after mine. Not one. I have exchanged random hellos and goodbyes but I have never really spoken to any of them. How pathetic is that? Not that I am ever very social but it's kinda sad that I spent almost a year in the company of 120 strangers and made no attempt to get to know even one. Let's not even talk about the people in the other courses. Basically, when I leave Bhubaneshwar on March 20th for good, I'll be leaving behind about 300 strangers, 110 aquaintances and 10 people I talk to occasionally. I deserve a medal. Yay me!

I learnt a card game called Big Fool yesterday; not very challenging, but fun. I was the Big Fool three times running so maybe I shouldn't call it "not very challenging", but whatever.

I am going to be in Hyderabad, atleast initially. I received a letter from WFII a week ago. So, Hyderabad and on May 3rd - My first foray into the working community. A cog in the wheel of a humungous machine. Should be amusing to see what happens.

Nothing else to write. I am going down to wait for the food to come. I have ordered Biriyani. Until I came here, I had had biriyani probably twice in my entire life. Now I have it atleast once a week. My stomach is calling out for food.

Buh bye.

I hate Cafe Mocha.

I laughed so much today.

About 30 of us were sitting in Coffee Day in a circle. We were telling embarrassing stories about other people and it was fun. Then I ordered a Cafe Mocha. NJ started it. He said, "Why don't you have a Cafe Mocha?". And the others picked it up. Everybody started asking why I didn't have Cafe mocha. What can you say when whatever you say to it, somebody asks you why you don't have Cafe Mocha. The conversation went like this:

Me:(To the barista) One Cafe Mocha, please.
NJ: Meera, Why don't you have a Cafe Mocha?
Me: I am having a Cafe Mocha.
NJ: But why don't you have a Cafe Mocha?
Me: Ugh. Stop it. It's annoying.
S picks it up next.
S: Meera! Have a Cafe Mocha.
Me: Aaaaaaaaaaaaah. You know that this makes no sense at all right.
X: But Meera, you should have a Cafe MOCHA!
Me: Enough! Somebody is going to die if you don't stop now.
NJ by now had passed around a note written on a tissue - 'Ask Meera: Why don't you have a Cafe Mocha? Pass this around.'
And so they all asked me. Imagine 30 people asking you "Why don't you have a Cafe Mocha?"
And then they said it in unison. Damn. By now the baristas were also laughing. Everybody who came were told to ask me why I didn't have cafe mocha. I was red.
And KJ was video taping it. Not funny at all. Even though I was laughing too.

I hit NJ a lot after that. And I deputed MS to hit him some more. She did.

Now people are buzzing me on yahoo and gtalk asking me why I don't have have Cafe Mocha. And on Lan Messenger. Seriously people, get a life.

I can't believe I blogged about this.

turtles

We went last night to see the mass nesting of Olive Ridley Turtles. 'We' being 20 people from my college. We were supposed to leave at 6pm and we left almost on time at 8pm. Not bad. Armed with flashlights and waterbottles, we went out to watch this incredibly weird 'thing'. What is the fascination in watching turtles lay eggs? But we went anyway. It was a 3hr trip to the sea side and we stopped only 3 times. Once for the other car to catch up with us, as our driver was the only one who knew the way, once for the other car to fill petrol and once for the drivers to pack dinner at a dhaba. The other car was more trouble than it was worth. The people in it kept getting out of it and it was the subject of much colourful cursing in our car. We got there in a blaze of hindi music and fog lights. 'There' being the grandiosely named 'Sea Turtle Exploration Centre'. It was a one room building with a bunch of pictures of turtles on the wall and some eggs and baby turtles in formalin. Gross. We then set off with our guides to see the turtles, some 3 and a half hours after we had left home.

This is where the story become a tale of me being grossly unfit for any sort of physical exertion, especially on sand. But it was fun. We walked through relatively hard ground for a while and then on a sand ridge, on both sides water. It was eerie. We were walking in single file and though there was a lot of space on both sides, it was unsettling to see silent water on both sides. By this time we could hear the sea. Man, it was loud. We stopped and had to roll up our jeans and remove our shoes. There was a lot of exclaiming about 'should I remove my shoes?', 'what if there are crabs?' and 'let's go'. A guy was saying something like 'Aah so' and I heard it as 'Asshole'. Apparently it means 'let's go' or 'get on with it' or something like that in Oriya. Stupid me. We walked across some 5 meters of knee high water and climbed up over a sand bund and we were on the beach! I had been at the beginning of the column of people at the start; now I was some feet behind the end. I was already panting and sweating. Not nice. This is when we saw the first turtle.

They had told us to switch off the torches but the dolts I had come with kept turning them on and scaring the poor turtles. Poor mamas. How would you feel if a bunch of 20 ft tall giants came with video cameras when you were giving birth and insisted on saying "so sweet" and kept touch your shell and head?

It was quite dark and there was no moon yet. The sky was scarily huge. It just went on forever. I have not seen so many stars ever. It was fun pointing out constellations. Orion and the Big dipper were easy to spot. I thought I saw Saggitarius a little south west of Orions left foot but I couldn't find it again.

We saw a few more turtles and even some eggs.


Our guides picked up some eggs and fed us some crap about how those eggs had been drenched in sea water and so wouldnt hatch properly if left to their own devices and so they were going to take them back and keep them till they hatch. Ha! They were going to have turtle egg omlettes. We prevailed on them to put them back. They did, after a lot of grumbling. One of the guys said that the forest rangers would let dogs and birds eat the eggs but not people. He said that was hypocrisy, for weren't people also in the food chain? Or something to that effect. Is it hypocrisy? I think the minute we could think and act on more than just instinct, we took ourselves out of the food chain. Comments?

We had to leave soon after for the tide was rising. The moon was coming up over the horizon and it was a weird orange colour.

I almost forgot. There was this really rickety bridge that we had to cross. It was made of bamboo shoots tied together and had wood railings over maybe a quarter of the length. I thought I was in for a major embarrassment. Thank god nothing happened. The first time we went across it, there was no water underneath; but on the way back there was a lot of water. Wet and humiliated! Thank you, whoever built it, for looking out for me. Even if you didn't, thank you.

On the way back we stopped at Chilika Dhaba for dinner. At 2am. It was great food.
Got back at 4.30 am. Bathed. Slept. Woke. Had lunch.

And I still can't get the sky out of my mind. It was brilliant. More than brilliant. It was like an amazing natural infinity pool. The sea stretching out forever, and the sky going on and on. The horizon was blurred. It was impossible to say where the sea ended and the sky began. Awesome.

Screw the turtles. The sky alone was worth the trip.

Recruitment process.

I had to put this link up.

Wanted: A Few Good Taliban Terrorists

They send the presentation ahead and then the interested candidates come "on site" to get interviewed and if selected, are sent for training in the world famous "Taliban University" in the scenic mountains of Afghanistan and after training there is hope of foreign placement and the bonus for a job well done is eternal salvation?

This is quite similar to what I went though to get a job. Except for the location and eternal salvation bits.

Of bleagggghh.

I am itching all over.

Here's what happened. At 12AM today, I went to the front of the mess with a couple of others, one of whom told me tales of chocolate cakes and no dunkings so that I was well and truly fooled.

There were only about 6 - 8 people sitting on the stairs and they all said the Happy Birthdays. All was well. Then A got a bottle of Pepsi and poured it over me. IT WAS COLD!! Then N came with a plate of maida. It was the beginning of the end. The plate was emptied over me, with the flour getting EVERYWHERE. Then came the water and you could have made cake off me. With the formalities taken care of, they proceeded to demand entertainment! I stood firm. Na na na nana. I refused to sing, dance, spout nursery rhymes, imitate profs, and generally make a fool of myself. Very spoilt-sportish, but who cares. Then came the cake and I ate a slice and some ended up on my face. Childish people. But the worst was yet to come.

I went back to the hostel; groped around my room and located the soap, towel and clothes to change into. I went into the bathroom. I had to peel of my clothes - first the T-shirt and sweatpants. Then the unmentionables. Gross. There was this grainy, white paste on my clothes, with bits of brown (cake) - all over my T-shirt and under. How the hell did cake get in my bra? Ugh. And my hair! My poor poor hair! It has been subjected to the worst possible treatment today. I washed it first with shampoo to no avail. Then more shampoo. No help. In desparation, I tried soap and ended up getting my hair hopelessly tangled up. It's not even long! This only made the maida get firmly entrenched. More shampoo followed and in a stroke of brilliance, I tried conditioner and voila! It worked! This followed the scraping off of the rest of the crap from the body. You don't know gross until you have dug globs of maida out of your navel. You might cringe now, but I actually had to do it!

All whining aside, I was quite happy. M gave me a damn cool card, with Krishna pics on it on a panel. It was very classy. (Krishna is definitely my favorite God, as far as I can have favorites when I don't really care about the religion as a whole. He seems like a very brilliant chap. For example, he ate mud when he was a kid, as did I. He fought and tamed evil sea-serpent and killed asuras all by himself, which I have not done but always wanted to do. He also stopped and gave a several hundred pages long speech in verse in the middle on what was supposedly one of the fiercest battles of all time. That takes guts, don't you think.)

I have rambled off course. What I meant to say is that I was pleased as Punch* with the whole thing. And when they brought out the cake. Chocolate! Definitely a great time. Hope they enjoyed all the mess they made.

Happy Birthday to me.



This is me, after the "Workshop on making CD look like she was in a flour blizzard". That was the cake. That was the knife I would have fallen on if I had embarrased myself further by "performing". I need to wax my hands.

*Who the hell is Punch anyway? Is it a reference to the drink or Punch of the Punch and Judy Show or some person Punch who was pleased all the time?

P.s. God Bless Cinthol, L'oreal and Garnier for their brilliant soaps, shampoos and conditioners respectively. I never thought I would think Rs.62 for a 100 ml bottle of conditioner was 'worth it, but it was worth 10 times that. Bless you.

P.P.s Saw Syriana and Brokeback Mountain. Syriana was ok. Not great but Brokeback was painfully boring. Very disappointed. To make up for that disappointment, I'll watch Shrek 2 tomorrow.

On bad spelling and other stuff.

I hate it when people write "Boyz", "Klub" and words of that type. I don't understand why it is cool to misspell words. I told somebody this and they pointed out that I use "k" for "ok". It's ok when I do it. I just don't like other people doing it. Why is that so difficult to comprehend?

Have to go get my ass kicked and self dunked.. The birthday today. My life just got very complicated.

Spoilers.

Good movies and bad...

Munich is definitely a good movie. There was nothing but the Munich Olympic killings, getting the 'Eye for an eye' team together and killing the guys who did it. No romance, no comedy, no fillers, except for the bits about Eric Bana's wife and child. It was almost like a documentary. Bana was so wasted in the Hulk. He's brilliant. So was Geoffery Rush and all the others. The new James Bond was perenially in a blue shirt in the movie. I wonder what that was all about. There are a couple of lines that stuck with me: when they are discussing whether what they are doing is right or not and how Jews are supposed to be righteous, another guy says, 'How do you think we got the land? By asking?' and in another part, Daniel Craig says, 'The only blood that matters to me is Jewish blood'.

The movie was slightly weird. It was a little too easy to find the Palestinian terrorists. All they needed to do was, 'Find a guy called Louis in Paris' and he knew where every terrorist in Europe was. Do they have GPS on them or something? There was also this Godfather-esque father of Louis, who pats Bana on the cheek and says, 'You could have been my son. But you are not; Remember that', while giving him a package of food he cooked.

Also, why would the Mossad pick 5 guys who had little to no "field" experience to take care of 11 terrorists and put a self-proclaimed paper pusher in charge? He says in the beginning of the movie, 'I have a very boring job. I sit at a desk all day at the office'.

But it was still a good movie, especially coming up after 'The Day of Destruction'.

Oh God, what a disaster. Not only was it a terrible movie, it was also a terribly long movie. 2.52 hours long. That is awfully long for an awfully bad movie. It was 'Twister' meets 'Day after Tomorrow' minus what ever little plots, likable characters and decent animation those two movies had. Bad, bad movie. And I saw the whole thing with head phones, because my bloody speakers weren't working. Ugh. That guy who comes in 'The Practise' was there. My aunt thinks he's cute. I think he always looks like he has a sinister secret. Either that or he has to go really badly. Anyway, plot - Storm coming down from Canada. Storm coming up from Texas. Meets over Chicago. All hell breaks loose. Throw in tenacious Asian American-ish reporter with a stereotyped African American camera man, pilot with pregnant wife, power-hungry power company CEO, poor 'I'm just here to do my job' electricity distribution company chap who is also cheating on his wife with the PR lady, rebellious teenage daughter with the anarchist-wannabe dumb boy friend, geek son, troubled wife, and way too many other characters. A terrible waste of 3 hrs. I could have slept!

And then there's 'The Piano Teacher'. I'm not even going there. Awful french movie about repressed piano teacher, with a controlling mother, who tries to seduce her student and ends up getting raped by him. I think. She stabbed herself in the end. I was so creeped out, grossed out, confused and bored that I have no idea what happened after that. And subtitles!

This would be a good time to tell me to get a life.

TV.

AXN - CSI:Miami.

Dead people, tests, guy supposed to be dead turns up alive blah blah blah...

Change channel.

Discovery - Mongolia, poverty, small room, very cold.

Change channel.

Star Movies - Seabiscuit.

Change.

Star World - Grammy Awards.

Paul McCartney & Linkin Park singing Yesterday, Jay-Z rapping in the foreground.

Pain.

On religion

Today, during a very boring lecture, a friend gave me his take on religion. Here it is, in my words.

When people were still hunting and lived in caves, they were shit scared of nature and there was nothing they could do - to control it or predict it. They didn't know what caused storms, earthquakes, and stuff and that scared them shitless. So they started praying, for lack of anything better to do. They prayed to the sun, the rain, the wind, the moon and the larger animals. That is how religion must have evolved. So basically religion was created out of fear of death and destruction by forces greater than people. So when and why did this concept of religion as "peaceful" and God as "kind" come about? And now that we know what caused natural disasters and we don't fear any animal anymore, atleast not to the point of thinking we'll be a snack soon, so why do we still have religion? What do we fear so much now that we need something bigger than us to protect us?

He didn't say it so well, the words are all mine, but that is what he meant.

What do you think?

Justification of life? Purpose of life? Meaning of life? Faith? Social conditioning? "You are what your childhood makes"? Guilt? Fear?

I am not debating the existence of God. Just the need for religion.

Did you see the news reports on the caricatures? Go here, here or here.

I don't know what to think. A part of me thinks, "What the hell were they thiking? They know people are very sensitive about religion. They are either stupid or suicidal." Another part of me thinks, "Take a joke. Yeah, a bad joke but seriously!." Death threats over cartoons? CLosing embassies? Buring the American flag when it was Denmark, Germany, France, Spain and Italy which carried the cartoons? Boycott of products?

Isn't it time for people to grow up?

Would I feel this offended if Krishna was made fun of? No. I'd probably laugh along. But yeah, I can see the BJP and the RSS and the VHP going up in arms the way they did for M.F.Hussein's Saraswati and the movie Fire. Can Christians take a joke about Jesus Christ? I didn't know, so I googled "Jesus Jokes" and this was the first link. What about Buddhists? They are the best of us all! There is actually a category called Buddhist Humor and nobody has gotten killed yet.

What do you think? I think it is ok to make fun of religions. Maybe humor is the first step toward acceptance? Maybe not but by killing the people who poke fun at you, what do you prove? That you are an over-sensitve buffoon who can't take a joke? Is it worth it?

Why are people who are so into religion so obsessed with it? What is it about religion that surgically removes some people's 'rational' bits? Do they think God does not have a sense of humor? Is that not insulting to God?

Of things...

N: Is there a female version of chivalry?
M: Yes, it's called manners.
She was very amused.

Am I cool or what?
Anyway, is it?

Somebody sent me www.pandora.com on the messenger. I have been listening to artists similar to The Rasmus for about 10 mins now and I am not bored yet. A good sign. I have heard stuff by The Rasmus, Negative, Thornley and Fuel so far. Good stuff.

I am having a long and meaningful conversation with Mr.Writers' Block. He apparently has nothing but contempt for me and keeps piling on the blockages. Madam Inspiration seems to have taken an undeserved vacation. Mr.WB should kindly leave so that I can get on with the writing. He should also get Madam I back from whichever Bollywood movie song sequence location she vacations in.

Help me.

Back to The Rasmus.

Edit: How the hell does Ashlee Simpsom sound like Coldplay? Die Pandora, Die.

Of anniversaries and things.

What is so special about 5? Why do people celebrate the 25th anniversary and the 60th birthday with so much pomp and ceremony? I feel bad for the 24s and the 57s of the number family. Is it fair to them? Just because we have 5 fingers in each hand! Now the sis turned 20 last week. Hurrah for her and everythng but why is the big two oh bigger than the say one nine? Other than the leaving the teens behind and all that. That reminds me of the line in The Fellowship of the Rings about the "Tweens - The irresponsible years between 20 and 30". They should make a sitcom about it. They seem to be making sitcoms about everything.

Back on the subject, I turn 23 in less than a fortnight. Now why is this less monumental than when I turn 30? And what is so scary about that number that people scream and run when they hear it? What is the big fun in staying young? Nobody listens to you, you need permission for everything, you are ignorant and in the company of similarly ignorant people atleast 5 days a week and 8 hours a day. Not that growing old is any fun either. I am not taking about the medication and wrinkles, just that it all seems so pointless. Which brings us back to the ultimate question? What am I doing that requires this existence? What am I going to do? Are the Gods running a betting pool on which stupid human will do which moronic thing next? Or is it some sort of gigantic Truman Show?

This post seems to have run away from me. I'll get back to you when I know what I am talking about. Cheers.

Gmail Quote for the Day

"Comedy is jus a funny way of being serious" - Peter Ustinov.

Huh?

Oddly enough it make sense. Sort of.

Somebody sent this on Yahoo Messenger -

Happy Saraswati Puja.

Comments?